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RIPD-poster2013

Genre: Action, Comedy, Crime

Directed by: Robert Schwentke

Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Jeff Bridges, Mary-Louise Parker

With Ghostbusters fighting the World’s ghosts & ghouls and Men In Black watching the skies, who’s going to protect us from the undead when Rick Grimes fails? If Robert Schwentke is to be believed, the answer is the R.I.P.D. (Rest In Peace Department), a team comprised of only the best dearly departed lawmen. The premise may have the whiff of originality, but the story certainly doesn’t.

Nick is our experienced copper who, having got cold feet about a pile of gold he helped steal, is killed by his corrupt partner. However, his talents as a cop allow him to escape hell, be recruited by the R.I.P.D. and partner up with 19th century lawman Roy to stop “deados”. A few McGuffins later, Roy & Nick are fighting to save the World from becoming overrun with the undead. Despite borrowing from both of the aforementioned franchises it shares DNA with, R.I.P.D. is a frustratingly dull affair; comprised of poor writing, wasted talent & awful graphics.

Leading the charge is charisma vacuum Ryan Reynolds, who continues to display a lack of any sort of acting ability. It doesn’t help that, like all the characters, his part is vastly underwritten with the most interesting element of his story – his want to spend just a few more moments with his still living wife – persistently forgotten about. Jeff Bridges tries his best, but his voice & the constant barrage of rubbish that comes from it becomes annoying quicker than you’d expect; his admittance that he was disappointed with the film’s end result cannot be held against him. Meanwhile, Kevin Bacon takes just enough time out from telling me how incredible my 4G reception is to play what could be this year’s most uninteresting villain & Mary-Louise Parker continues to show her predilection for the older gentleman.

Having failed to squeeze any laughs or thrills out of his formulaic opening hour, Schwentke tries to ramp up the excitement for the film’s final third. Cue a McGuffin that’s remarkably similar to the galaxy pendant from Men In Black, which will open a wormhole in the sky identical to the one in Ghostbusters. The following barrage of CGI “deados” looks like they’ve stumbled off the screen of a poorly rendered videogame & the finale is so schmaltzy it makes the mind boggle.

Drop dead dreadful!

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